say what you mean...mean what you say

it was late in the afternoon on a pretty hot day... I had started a project, and now needed help. the directions were right there, and I had read the step. what i didn't do is read the whole step, nor did i explain the process very well. so my help was not exactly prepared for the task. and since my help was my wife of 25 years, it may not have been the best choice for marital bliss... you see my wife does not like conflict, and will avoid at all costs. however, she did not know that she had offered to help a frustrated mechanic.

big beads of sweat were dripping in my eyes, and i had been fighting the steps from the sheet...i tried reading ahead but was not comprehending, or retaining what they were conveying. so i did what any man would do..press on! I don't need no stinking directions! the part is heavy, awkward, and just fits in the intended slot. there are also wires that are placed in inconvenient locations.

so now we are fully committed to the installation process, and i realize the part is caught on a wire...on her side, but cant say watch the wire with out sounding quite irritated. and after 15 minutes of trying, retrying, and nearly forcing the piece into place...there were several irritated sounding comments that slipped from my mouth.

eventually, the part is in place and can support its own weight...but i spent 3 more hours trying to get the bolt to secure this beastly part.

while i was not frustrated at her, why does it sound like i was? how does one convey importance or dire attention is needed without sounding like your nagging or chipping at someone else? obviously, i am not sure...but i do know that i am better than i once was. thanks only to the grace of God!